I judge people. I judge them based on their appearance. The clothes they wear. The energy they give off. Even their body language gives me clues. I’ve gotten extremely skilled in putting all these things together in record time — usually within five seconds — to create a detailed image of their personality. Usually before they’ve even said a word. If this image turns out to be something I like, I’ll interact with them. If it’s not, I’ll sometimes completely ignore them or stay out of their way.
Previously, I even fooled myself thinking how smart I must be, for being able to do this… It’s freakin’ ridiculous. And stupid.
The fact that I still do this sometimes, bothers me. I’ve been trying to pay attention when this happens, so I can stop it. But I still find it hard to change, even though I’m aware.
Usually the picture is finished before I even realized I was painting.
It’s like when I bite my nails. A habit I just can’t seem to shake. When I realize I’m doing it, most of my nails or gone already…
I’m not entirely sure why we have the need to be so selective when it comes to meeting others. Maybe it’s because we think that meeting “uninteresting” people is a waste of time and that life’s to short for it…
